I'm Going To...
In five years, I am going to....
When I get my Master's, I'm going to...
Next month, I'm going to....
Before my 24th birthday, I'm going to...
Stop. Please. Stop.
It is important to have goals. PLEASE continue to have plans. My question isn't about your intentions. It is not about telling you not to do what you want to do.
My question is what are you doing today?
Did you wake up and listen to your favorite song? (My personal drive to work jam is "Groove is in the Heart") Did you wear your favorite clothes? Did you plan your day?
Or did you save that song for a different day? Did you wait to wear that shirt for your big meeting next week or until you lose the weight to feel comfortable in it? Did you not even think about what you were doing today because you are already living in the meetings of next week?
While I am a huge fan of Kanye, the line "I'm living in the future, because the present is my past" has been the way I have been living my life lately. And honestly? It is the worst.
Because I have been so focused on who "Future Mackenzie" is going to be, I haven't even been myself. I introduce myself based on what I'm going to do versus what I do now.
Do not get me wrong, I am in an extremely transitional part of my life. I am nowhere near settled in any aspect of my life. Heck, I have introduced myself to one person a month before as something completely different than what I would tell them today. It has lead to a lot of awkward, backtracking conversations of "Well, I thought I wanted to.." and "Now I want to.." which let's be honest, is going to completely change next week so please do not even listen.
The problem is that I am not enjoying the journey. And as dark as it is, I might not even become the "Future Mackenzie" that I have been introducing myself as anyway. I am alive today, and that is what I need to focus on. You cannot plan the days that you are not guaranteed. All you can do is plan for right now.
All of this to say, I am Mackenzie. I coach volleyball. I workout. I work at IU. I live with my parents. And that is who I am today.
When I get my Master's, I'm going to...
Next month, I'm going to....
Before my 24th birthday, I'm going to...
Stop. Please. Stop.
It is important to have goals. PLEASE continue to have plans. My question isn't about your intentions. It is not about telling you not to do what you want to do.
My question is what are you doing today?
Did you wake up and listen to your favorite song? (My personal drive to work jam is "Groove is in the Heart") Did you wear your favorite clothes? Did you plan your day?
Or did you save that song for a different day? Did you wait to wear that shirt for your big meeting next week or until you lose the weight to feel comfortable in it? Did you not even think about what you were doing today because you are already living in the meetings of next week?
While I am a huge fan of Kanye, the line "I'm living in the future, because the present is my past" has been the way I have been living my life lately. And honestly? It is the worst.
Because I have been so focused on who "Future Mackenzie" is going to be, I haven't even been myself. I introduce myself based on what I'm going to do versus what I do now.
Do not get me wrong, I am in an extremely transitional part of my life. I am nowhere near settled in any aspect of my life. Heck, I have introduced myself to one person a month before as something completely different than what I would tell them today. It has lead to a lot of awkward, backtracking conversations of "Well, I thought I wanted to.." and "Now I want to.." which let's be honest, is going to completely change next week so please do not even listen.
The problem is that I am not enjoying the journey. And as dark as it is, I might not even become the "Future Mackenzie" that I have been introducing myself as anyway. I am alive today, and that is what I need to focus on. You cannot plan the days that you are not guaranteed. All you can do is plan for right now.
All of this to say, I am Mackenzie. I coach volleyball. I workout. I work at IU. I live with my parents. And that is who I am today.
Comments
Post a Comment